


The Storm will Pass

by TheStrayOne



Series: Our Maknae [2]
Category: ASTRO (Band)
Genre: Depressed charachter, Depression, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, caring hyungs, sanha-centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-15
Updated: 2018-06-15
Packaged: 2019-05-23 13:31:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,104
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14935200
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheStrayOne/pseuds/TheStrayOne
Summary: Sometimes, when storms hit, they don't leave much of an impact.  Only a few puddles to show they were even there.  Other times, the leave towns and cities in ruins.  Sanha can't help but think that storms are a lot like life in that way.





	The Storm will Pass

**Author's Note:**

> There's been a lot of rain in our area lately and it inspired me to write this. I hope you enjoy.

The storm raged as he walked down the empty streets.  His clothes were soaked and he shivered in the cold.  The streets were starting to flood and the water was sloshing by his feet.  His fairly expensive tennis shoes were more than likely ruined but, despite all that, he couldn’t bring himself to care.  

 

       He knew it wasn’t a good idea to sneak during a thunderstorm at whatever ungodly hour it was, but he just had to get out.  After he’d made it out, he felt that it was worth it as the rain pelted against his skin.  The cold made him uncomfortable but at least it made him feel something rather than the emptiness that had consumed him before.

 

       It had been overwhelming.  All consuming.  The only thing he’d been able to focus on and sleep had been long forgotten.  The urge to hack at his skin had been nearly impossible to ignore and he’d almost given in. He just needed to feel something, anything at all.

 

      He’d been so close to doing it.  But, after having not hurt himself in over a year, he couldn’t bring himself to do it.  He couldn’t go back on all his hard work.  The many tearful band meetings and sleepless nights.  It would’ve all been for nothing if he’d went back on his promise to never do it again.    

 

       So, just as he started to press the blade to his skin, he’d changed his mind.  He’d put the knife back where it belonged and slipped on his shoes.  He didn’t bother with grabbing a jacket.  He had known it was pouring but he wanted to feel the rain against his skin.  Not wanted, needed to.  If he didn’t he knew he’d end up tearing into his skin.  

 

     Now, he walked the surprisingly quiet streets of Seoul.  Every inch of him was soaked but that didn’t stop him.  He just kept walking.  He wasn’t quite sure where he was going, but he trusted his feet to take him where he needed to be.  

 

      He wandered aimlessly, letting the sound of the rain drown out his thoughts.  Lightning flashed in the distance and he allowed the bright light to blind him from himself, the person he hated so much, the reason he was in the rain in the first place.

 

     As he walked down the streets, he couldn’t help but think about how confusing storms were to him.  

 

      They terrified him.  Thunder booming in the distance, sounding like a giant waiting to crush a town and all its inhabitants.  Lighting flashing in the sky, threatening to strike down what ever it please.  Rain causing lake water to rise and flood the streets.  It was all so frightening. 

 

     At the same time, found comfort in them.  Storms had never scared him when he was a child like it did other kids.  He never knew why, but the sound of the rain hitting the roof of his house was always one he’d look forward to.  The flash of lightning was always something he’d search for.  Something he longed for.  

 

      Later on in life, he found that there were many reasons to enjoy storms.  

 

      Rain brought hope to so many people.  People in some parts of the world hoped and prayed for rain just to survive.  Without rain they would starve and so rain brought hope.  It brought life.  It told people that there was a chance for them.  

 

     Not only that but it also brought hope to other people like himself.  Storms were unpredictable.  They came and went as they pleased.  They didn’t follow a strict pattern.  But there was something that was always consistent with storms.  

 

      They always went away.  

 

      No matter how long they raged on, the sun would eventually shine again.  Even if the flood waters were rising and the lighting was striking down building after building.  Even if it felt like the rainclouds would hang in the sky forever, they always moved on at some point.  

 

      In a lot of ways, storms were like life.  

 

      Life liked to throw curveballs.  Things that can’t be predicted or tracked.  There was no pattern to life.  It did as it pleased.  Getting rid of things it deemed necessary and leaving everything else damaged in some way, big or small.  And while life liked to show when it hit, some harder than others, things would get better.  Buildings could be repaired and flood waters would evaporate.  The sun would shine again, no matter how long the storm raged on and that brought him more hope than he though anything else could.

 

      He found himself smiling, even though everything seemed hopeless in his mind.  He knew the sun would be back soon, he just had to hang on till then.  He had to keep his head above the flood waters for just a little longer and everything would be better.  

 

      His smile did eventually fade, but the hope didn’t.  It remained somewhere inside him.  He wasn’t quite sure where but he knew it was there.  And that was all he needed to keep going.  

 

     It kept him walking along the empty streets until he, eventually, ended up back at the dorm.  

 

      He could see faint light peaking through the window and was unsurprised.  He hadn’t really worried about how loud he was being when he’d snuck out.  He never really did, so it was no surprise that he’d been heard by someone.  

 

     At the same time, he wasn’t afraid.  By now his hyungs knew that sometimes he just needed to get out for a bit.  They wouldn’t be angry, a bit worried but not angry.  They promised that they’d never be made at him for his depression.  

 

        They’d found out about it long before.  Maybe a month or so before they debuted Minhyuk had found the small blade he’d been using and took it to Jinwoo who, of course asked them all about it.  

 

     Once he’d admitted that it was his, they’d all been incredibly helpful.  They’d helped him fight the feelings that brought him to use it.  They distracted him from it all.  Made him forget it all and he found himself happier than he’d been in years.  They made him feel like a kid again.  The same kid who wasn’t afraid of storms. 

 

      None of them had never gotten angry or even showed impatience toward him when his depression made and appearance.  They only showed love and compassion and he couldn’t help but think that he was incredibly lucky.  There were so many like him who never had anyone to help them get better.  He had five people.  Five wonderful people whom he loved like brothers and wouldn’t trade for anyone else in the world.  

 

      So, as he walked up to their dorm and opened the dorm he wasn’t afraid.  When he saw Jinwoo waiting for him at the end of the hall he wasn’t afraid.  When the elder walked toward him briskly, he wasn’t afraid.  He would never be afraid of his hyungs.  

 

     Before his mind could fully register what was going on, he was being wrapped in a warm embrace.  It was only then that he noticed how deep the cold bit at him.  He shivered violently in his hyungs arms.  

 

     “Aish Sanha.  You’re freezing,” he commented as he pulled away, looking both concerned and relieved.  “Come on, let’s get you warmed up alright?”

 

     He allowed the older to pull him along down the hallway.  He could see Myungjun and Dongmin both sitting on the couch in the living room as the passed.  Both looked at him with the same relieved look.  He gave them a weak smile as they passed.  

 

      He didn’t question it when Jinwoo guided him into the bathroom and sat him down on the toilet seat.  Nor did he question it when he helped him peal of his wet clothes, which were sticking to his skin.  He just sat there and allowed it to happen.  

 

      The next thing he knew, he was being lowered into the warm water of the bathtub.  Any other time, he would’ve been embarrassed about being in a situation like this, but now it was only comforting.  He didn’t really pay attention as his hyung gently helped him bathe.  He found himself slowly growing tired and he was sure he’d dozed of at some point.  

 

      He only opened his eyes when the water was drained from the tub and a warm towel was wrapped around him.  It was only at that point that he’d realized that Myungjun had come in at some point.  The eldest gave him a smile and he smiled back.  

 

     The two of them helped him dress, though they knew he was capable of doing it on his own.  He was vaguely aware that the sweatshirt he was wearing was not his own.  It was most likely one of Dongmin’s since, while the shoulders were a bit to big for him, the length was perfect for his height.  

 

     Next, a towel was thrown over his head as one of the two dried his hair.  Once they were done, Myungjun pulled him to his feet.  

 

    Sanha allowed himself to be pulled along until they were back in the living room.  The elder sat him down on the couch and not a moment later, Dongmin walked in with a steaming cup in his head.  Jinwoo threw a blanket over him and Dongmin handed him the cup.  

 

     He mindlessly took a sip.  It was chamomile tea, he discovered quickly.  Dongmin always made it for him when his mind was too active.  It calmed him down.  

 

      Moonbin and Minhyuk came in a moment later, carrying and unnecessary amount of pillows and blankets.  Minhyuk tossed them on the floor and sat next to him.  Sanha immediately curled into his side, holding the warm cup to his chest.  

 

     Everyone else joined them a few minutes later.  It was a bit of a tight fit since the couch was only made for three but they made it work.  Several blankets were strewn over them as the curled close together.  Sanha was squeezed in between Minhyuk and Moonbin.  It wasn’t uncomfortable since he was flexible and he found himself curling further into Minhyuk’s side.  

 

      The elder wrapped and arm around him, an placed a gentle kiss on his forehead.  He could hear Myungjun and Moonbin singing in the background, something that had always comforted him.  He could feel his eyes closing against his will and didn’t protest when the cup of tea was taken away from him as he fell into a dreamless sleep only minutes later, the emptiness having faded to a point that was barely noticeable.  

 

* * *

 

 

      The next day, Sanha woke up, knowing that it was late in the day from the sunlight that flooded through the window.  Everyone else was still asleep around him and he smiled.  

 

      The storm had indeed passed, just like he knew it would.  He’d made it through.  He’d kept his head above the water and now he was standing on dry land.  

 

      He felt someone shift next to him and turned to see who it was.  Moonbin was looking at him with barely open eyes.  The elder didn’t look like he was going to be getting up anytime soon.  

 

      “You awake Sanha?” he asked, his voice sounded rough and scratchy from having just woke up.  

 

      “Yeah,” Sanha replied.  “Do we not have schedules today?”

 

     “Jinwoo canceled earlier this morning.  He said we all got sick and needed to stay home, now got back to sleep.  We’ve got all day,” Moonbin answered as he reached out to wrap and arm around him.  

 

      Sanha smiled, nuzzling his face into the elder’s chest.  “Okay hyung,” he said, already starting to feel tired again.  

 

      He smiled, content to sleep the day away, happy that the sun had come back.  He knew that a storm would come again, but he also knew he’d never have to to face it alone.  His hyungs would always be there for him, to help him keep his head above the flood waters.  

 

       And, now that the storm had passed, he felt like that same kid who wasn’t afraid of the rain.  He was ready for the next storm.  He didn’t know when it would come or how long it would last but he was ready for it.  He wasn’t afraid.  He was determined to make it through the next one because he always came out stronger than when he went in. 

 

     With those thoughts in mind, he feel back into a peaceful sleep, happy knowing he would never be alone when the next storm hit. 

**Author's Note:**

> I really hope you liked this. It was written at 3:00 a.m. because the storm woke me up but I'm still happy with how it turned out. It hasn't been proofread so feel free to point out any mistakes you see. Thank you for reading!


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